Scent of her Tormented Mind BrAvery Book 1
This is a romance novel intended for an adult audience. There are scenes depicting violence, both physical and psychological, and explicit sexual content. If that’s not your thing, you’re not in a place to read comfortably, or you know me in real life, consider this your final warning. If you’re still here, buckle up, and happy reading!
*To request a completed manuscript or for other professional correspondence, email [email protected]
Scent of her Tormented Mind
By Mary Selina
All Rights Reserved ©
“I don’t have a lot to give,
But I would give you everything,
Let me wrap you in
With my skin,”
–Two Queens in a King-sized Bed, girlinred
“Call it what you want,
‘cause I don’t even care anymore,
Call me what you need to,
To make yourself comfortable,
So I am debilitated,
I can’t remember where the sentence started when I’m trying to finish it,
And all of you are so frustrated,
Everyone around me is trying to help as much as they can…”
–Diagnosis, Alannis Morisette
To all my fellow queers and spoonies sick of not seeing ourselves centered in romance and adventure stories, this one’s for you.
Chapter 1: Chemistry
Brooke’s head was ablaze with pain. A searing light show behind her eyes, as explosive and distracting as an ill-timed fireworks display, but not enough to stop her from going to class.
She sat on the edge of her bed, head in her hands, staring out at the dorm room through her light eyelashes, and willing herself to move. She had awoken at 8:30am, after snoozing her alarm five times. She had risen slowly, desperately trying not to further enrage the clouds of pain that had gathered along her nerves as she slept. She quickly placed a Nurtec tablet on her tongue. It was meant to interrupt a migraine flare which would, from her experience, perhaps, take the edge off of her pain, but not much more. Due to the chronic nature of her migraines, Brooke didn’t have the luxury of staying home whenever she had a flare, or she would spend more than half of her time in bed. As she usually did, she decided that whether she stayed in would be decided by whether she was able to get ready in time or not. She never knew when she would be hit with a sudden wave of fatigue, nausea, lightheadedness, or pain, so her only course was to try to go about her normal morning routine as best she could, and see whether or not her body felt like cooperating today. It was 8:45 by the time she was dressed.
Brooke was somewhat disappointed that she still had time to get to class. It’s just one class, She rationalized, And it’s the first day, probably just handing out the syllabus and going over the professor’s personal way of doing things. All the convincing in the world would not make the prospect any better. Brooke was an artist at heart, this class being her attempt to get her one science requirement out of the way during the fall when her pain wasn’t quite as bad. She was currently regretting the decision. With a resigned sigh, She grabbed her backpack and shoved her sketch pad, a notebook, and a pencil into it. She pulled on her thick faux fur-lined trench coat and slung the bag over one shoulder. Sparing a quick glance over at the electric kettle, she lamented that there wasn’t time to make Coffee. It was almost like she could smell the rich earthy aroma as she looked over at the corner of her desk where the coffee station had been set up. Then she blinked, and it was gone. She left, locking the door behind her.
The crisp fall breeze swirled around Brooke, her flowing coat billowing out behind her as she hurried across campus. At least, as much as she could hurry without her POSTURAL ORTHOSTATIC TACHYCARDIA SYNDROME flaring up, WHICH WOULD DEFINITELY NOT HELP WITH HER MIGRAINE. Sometimes the two disorders would seem to compete with each other in severity, symptoms egging each other on in a devilish tornado. It truly was a cursed combination, and Brooke shivered when she thought about how apt t the term comorbidity felt in those moments. She was running late for her lecture. She speed-walked the rest of the way to class, her soft boots slapping against the sidewalk, long sandy blonde hair flying out loose behind her.
By the time she made it to the science building, Brooke was gasping for breath, and she could hear her heart pounding. She burst through the door haphazardly and slid into her seat right as the bell rang, signaling the start of the class. Brooke breathed a sigh of relief and slouched down into her seat, her eyes exploring the room. Her seat was near the back of the class so she could see most of her fellow students and, hopefully, wasn’t close enough to get called on by the professor. She needed a science credit to get her bachelor’s in visual art and CHEM101 had been the only available class when she registered. This would be tough. She got out a piece of paper from her sketchbook and a pencil to write some notes and tried to focus on the introductory lecture. Brooke wasn’t much one for hard sciences, though. After just a few minutes her attention started to wander, the throbbing pain around her ears making it difficult to focus.
She let her gaze drift lazily around the room, not taking anything in, until, suddenly, she saw her. The most gorgeous creature Brooke had ever laid eyes on. Brooke immediately straightened up to get a better look at the striking young woman ,who sat in the front row farthest from the door. She lounged gracefully in her chair, leather-clad arms resting on the desk, long, elegant fingers fidgeting where they were clasped on the empty table in front of her. Her jeans were black, the same as the rest of her clothes. She wore motorcycle boots that Brooke was willing to bet could do serious damage if you got on her bad side. The closest side of her face was half-hidden by thick dark curls, but Brooke could see just enough to tell that she was stunningly beautiful. Her skin wasa bright umber that seemed to capture the light around her, her eyes a deeper shade of gold, her features angular and almost feral, with wide, slanted eyes that only further emphasized the elegant sweep of her cheekbones. Brooke’s fingers itched to capture the image.
Brooke couldn’t pull her eyes away from the beautiful stranger. After a few seconds that seemed to drag out infinitely, perhaps feeling Brooke’s gaze on her, the woman turned and stared right back. The moment their eyes met, Brooke felt an overwhelming pull. It was like there was a bungee cord tied between them, attached at the centers of their chests, stretched taught and pulling Brooke towards her. She wanted nothing more than to twine their bodies together as close as was humanly possible and never let go. Visions flashed through Brooke’s mind of all the things she wanted this woman to do to her, too fast for her to process. Just then, the woman smiled, and Brooke felt like her heart was trying to jump out of her chest. She felt her pale cheeks flush crimson with heat.
Brooke started to get up out of her chair and was halfway to standing, perched awkwardly when she remembered where she was and stopped herself. She sat back down hurriedly, never taking her eyes off the stunning stranger across the room. The woman then abruptly stood up and started to walk away, making Brooke ache with bizarre loneliness. She strode confidently toward the classroom door, and as Brooke watched her leave, she stopped short. One hand holding the door open, she swiveled towards the back of the room, towards Brooke. They locked eyes. If anything, the connection Brooke felt was stronger this time. The woman smiled again, and with her other hand crooked one finger towards Brooke, beckoning. Then she was gone.
Brooke looked around her, flustered, unsure what to do. Every nerve in her body itched to jump out of her seat and follow her. She frantically glanced to the front of the room and the lecture she’d completely forgotten about. She scanned the whiteboard and saw a notice that this instructor preferred students to just leave the room when they had to use the restroom rather than disrupt the class by asking. Without a second thought, Brooke sprang out of her seat and hurried to the door, tripping slightly over one of the desks in her rush.
Out in the hallway, Brooke looked left and right, but there was no sign of anyone. She turned and headed for the restrooms, hoping her hunch was right. After a thirty second speed-walk, she opened the door to the women’s room and there she was, leaning casually against the counter. She was almost a foot taller than Brooke’s 5’4”, with a taught, athletic build. Before the door had even shut behind her, the beauty was striding forward. Brooke felt the heat rise in her cheeks as she took a couple of instinctive steps backward, slightly intimidated.
“I’m Avery,” said the woman, and her voice was smooth like honey, with low, husky notes woven through it.
“Brooke.” The word had hardly left her lips when the stranger, Avery, closed what little distance remained between them and bent down so their lips hovered a hair’s breadth apart. Brooke was alive with longing in an instant. Every nerve she had was alight with anticipation, her muscles tensed, her heels leaving the floor to try to get as close to Avery as she could. Avery was close enough that Brooke could smell her perfume. It smelled of cedar, pine, fresh-fallen rain, and the cold smell of leaves crunching underfoot. She stared into Avery’s eyes, like pools of molten gold, and willed her to kiss her.
Avery captured Brooke’s lips in a ferocious kiss. Her mouth tasted like cinnamon and hot cloves. She put her hands on Brooke’s waist and pressed her against the cool wood of the bathroom door. Brooke returned the kiss fervently, deepening it with her tongue, only to eagerly let Avery take the lead seconds later. Brooke gave herself over to the strong arms, and skilled tongue, sighing whenever she drew breath. She twined her hands into Avery’s dark hair, pulling her closer. Avery pressed them together, legs entwined, her muscular frame pinning Brooke in place.
Brooke didn’t know how long they stayed like that, locked in passion, gasping for breath between long, deep dalliances. Her fingers combed through thick black locks. She gave a small tug, and Avery growled softly, her hands roaming up and down over Brooke’s body, tracing the ample curves of her hips, fluttering up under the hem of her shirt to fan across her back, pulling her even closer. Avery’s hand came up to cup Brooke’s cheek and tilted her head up so she could capture her lips once again.
They broke apart reluctantly, their hands laying last, lingering touches on each other’s bodies. Avery brushed the back of one hand across her lips and flashed a smirk that made Brooke melt.
“Can I put my number in your phone?” Avery asked, and Brooke could hardly hear what she was saying, her mind still awash in a haze of pleasure. She fumbled to pull her phone from her pocket, but her fingers were clumsy. No sooner did she pull it out than Avery reached forward and quickly snatched the phone from her. She tapped through the contact menus and typed in her number, leaning forward and dropping Brooke’s phone back into her pocket, her hand lingering to trail over Brooke’s hip.
“I’ll see you soon,” Avery said, stepping around Brooke, her shoulder tingling where she brushed past. Brooke was left standing in the bathroom, flustered, struggling to believe what had just happened. She slid down the door so she was sitting on the cold floor of the bathroom, knees drawn up to her chest. It felt like she was dreaming. But she could still feel the lingering warmth from Avery’s body pressing against hers.
After several minutes of quiet bliss, Brooke got to her feet and left the bathroom. She wandered down the hall, kiss-drunk, unsure where she was heading. All at once, the awareness of the pain in her head returned, and she almost doubled over at the sharp squeeze of the imaginary vice around her ears. She walked straight past the chemistry classroom, down the stairs, and out onto the quad. The weather was overcast but not rainy, perfect for Brooke’s photophobic eyes. The trees were so beautiful, all decked out in their autumn colors.
Back in her dorm room, Brooke finally made the coffee she’d been craving and settled into bed to enjoy it, the large mug clutched between cold fingers. The rich, shar taste of the coffee swirled across Brooke’s tastebuds, making everything a little better.
There was a maple tree outside the window that stood out to Brooke. Its leaves hadn’t quite turned all the way yet, some in the bottom branches were red and orange but most of the boughs were laden with leaves of bright gold. Almost like they were covered in gold leaf. They were the same color as Avery’s eyes!
With a bright flare of motivation, Brooke retrieved her sketchbook and a pencil, sighing contentedly. Her hand trailed lazily over the page, sketching outlines and shadings. She outlined the shape of a face, emphasizing the cheekbones, sharpening the chin, darkening the hair, until the sketch began to resolve into Avery’s face. Brooke pulled up the corner of the drawing’s mouth so that she was smirking, her dark eyebrows slightly raised, a glint in her eyes. The wind lifted and a leaf from the maple tree fell in a spiral, landing on Brooke’s windowsill. That was what her sketch was missing. The glowing burnished gold of Avery’s eyes that had so captivated her. Rummaging through the smaller pockets of her backpack, Brooke found a gold sharpie she’d bought for one of her art projects in high school the year before. Carefully, she filled in the irises of her drawing with metallic gold ink.
Drawing Avery stared up from the page at Brooke, the sparkle in her eye quite literal now. Brooke admired her work and the memories it evoked. Just then, the double doors to the science building opened across the quad and students began to flood out. She’d wasted a whole period daydreaming about Avery. She had no more classes that afternoon so she opted to work on her first homework assignment from her form drawing class, but the entire time, all she could think about was that kiss. The best kiss of her life. Little did she know… a life-changing kiss.